Tuesday, September 09, 2008

Thursday Thirteen...college classes for Men


13 College Classes for Men I'd like to See

1. Class one: How to fill the Ice Cube Trays-Step by Step, with slide presentation.

2. Class two: The Toilet Paper Roll...Does it Change Itself? Round Table Discussion.

3. Class three: Is It Possible to Urinate Using the Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Avoiding the Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub?....Group practice.

4. Class four: Fundamental Differences Between the Laundry Hamper and The Floor---pictures and Explanatory Graphics.

5. Class five: Dinner Dishes--Do they wash themselves? Introduction to the dish washer and group sessions around the kitchen sink. Rubber gloves optional.

6. Class six: How to share the remote control with your significant other. Deep breathing exercises included. Help line Support and Support Groups.

7. Class seven: Real men ask directions when lost---Real life testimonies.

8. Class eight: Sensitivity training; classes on bringing her flowers, remembering her birthday and recommendations for Christmas presents which does not include gift cards to Lowes, Home Depot , or Sporting Goods Store.

9. Class nine: A Man, A Can, and a Microwave. How to fix dinner for yourself without relying on take out. Hands on demonstrations using the can opener and actual taste test of recipes. Handout include poison control numbers, and home remedies upset stomachs.

10. Class ten: Is it Genetically Impossible to Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks? Driving Simulations and tranquilizers included.

11. Class eleven: How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion. Relaxation Exercises, Meditation, and Breathing Techniques.

12. Class twelve: How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy--Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and other Important Dates and How to Call When You Are Going to be Late. Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered.

13. Class thirteen: The Stove/Oven--What Is It and How Is It Used. Live Demonstrations.

Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!





23 comments:

Adelle said...

All I can say is thank God I'm allergic to men LOL Too bad most of these apply to teenagers and I have two of them at home Yikes! Great list. Happy T13!

Sheeshintx said...

This is wonderful. Great list. Happy TT.

Meju said...

Totally hilarious! Can I send hubby over for lessons?! Great TT.

SandyCarlson said...

That these things constitute "higher learning" tells us much!

Alice Audrey said...

LOL. Good list. I'm glad my dh doesn't need the poison control numbers. Unless that much tobasco could be toxic....

Lori said...

I only have one thing to say...AMEN! Great list. Happy TT and thanks for stopping by:)

bernieg1 said...

Great list. A truthful one too!

My TT is up here.

SJ Reidhead said...

They'd all flunk!

SJR
The Pink Flamingo

Jane said...

Where can I sign him up!!!!
Great list girl....very fun.

Gattina said...

Hahaha ! I think there are quite a few men who need to go to that school, lol !

Pamela Kramer said...

Oh it hurts! Funny stuff. Happy TT and thanks for stopping by. I had to Twitter your post.

Anonymous said...

Uhm, I don't know what century you live in. But I'd say that there's really no need for any of those classes. Sure I can only speak for myself as a man. But maybe it's time to start dating regular guys instead of stereotypes.

Just my two cents..

Sarah said...

That is a super list! I make my boys sit in the bathroom, or they can clean the toilet themselves! LOL~
#12 is super! I think you should start this class up for them!

I have my TT up to here

Brenda ND said...

LOL, some of these we all could use. Happy TT!

Clara said...

This list is hilarious! I love the ending comment that diplomas will be issued to the survivors.

Happy TT!

YellowRose said...

Hubby just got his Master's but I do believe he missed these classes...LOL! Great list!

Flip Flop Floozie said...

I can truly say now after all these 44 some plus years that Mikey can pass a couple of these tests without being shown..YES

Sandy

Army Mom said...

Oh my gosh!!!! Your list was soooo funny. I'm sure people at the front desk at the hotel thought I totally lost it, I was laughing so hard. I was using the hotel's business center to do e-mails when I'm out of town. My I share your list with my co-workers? I especially loved the remote control one. I get to touch the remote control maybe once a month and my husband has seven remote controls for all the gagetry we have in our home! Thanks for visiting my blog.

Beckie said...

HI Daisy!!!! I love this list!!! I think I need a couple of those classes myself. Enjoyed this immensely!!! I've actually got a post today!!!!

PEA said...

LOL omigosh, I'm laughing so much, the tears are streaming down my cheeks! hehe xoxo

Linda said...

These are priceless!!! I once told hubby never to buy me anything I had to plug in! He had done pretty good over the year.

Stop by when you get a chance. I have an award for you.

Have a great weekend.

Melli said...

Where do we sign 'em up? ALL my men need to attend college!

WomensDaily said...

Ughhh I hate going in to the bathroom and seeing an empty toilet paper roll!

 
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