Friday, April 24, 2009

Friday Funny..Who Knew?



AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES*


1.Avoid cutting yourself when slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop.


2.Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.


3.For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer..


4.A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to
sleep after you hit the snooze button.

5.If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives; then you'll be afraid to cough.


6.You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD -40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.

7.Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

8.If you can't fix it with a hammer, you've got an electrical problem.

6 comments:

Linda said...

Don't know if #4 would have worked for me when I was working. I was so hard to get up. Now, I'm up by 7:30 most days. And #6 is my strategy for fixing things too. l0l

Have a great weekend.

Ramblins of a middle-aged goddess said...

I am with Linda...#6 is my way to fix things too and has always worked. Boy this is really a redneck way to do things...smile!! Never knew much about rednecks till I moved here...I am so happy that you have a weekend off. I am trying to clean today..i still cannot get on that knee and it is really hard to clean a bathtub or a stool..whew..Take care...

Melli said...

Sssshhhh on that #7 thing, pleeeease?
I'm still trying to convince Dr. J's family that I really AM normal! WHAT??? I said SSSSSSHHHHHHH!

Carole Burant said...

LOL oh my goodness, I almost spit out my coffee while reading this!! Too funny!!! hehe My favourite had to be #5...imagine being too scared to cough! lol xoxo

craziequeen said...

#6 made me laugh so hard I pulled my stitches... :-D

I'm SO sending this to MB - he'll love it!

cq

Norma said...

These are hilarious. Thanks.

 
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